yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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