I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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