why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
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