I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
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