It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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