I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
