Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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