Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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