doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
