didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Damn victory sex feels great
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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