I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
