I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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