you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
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