I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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