He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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