he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
