He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
