Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
