I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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