how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
