Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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