What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize