She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
birth control should be required to get into college
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
you made out with another girl for some wings
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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