Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
