Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
