I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
so let's talk penis.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
