Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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