my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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