Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
you would pick up someone in the library
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize