i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Terrible idea I love it
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
