I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize