if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
