We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize