doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize
