i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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