just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
