I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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