I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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