Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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