problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
