You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
