I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
