He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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