I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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