The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
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