Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
