i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
