Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I don't deserve a penis
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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