dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
