If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize