in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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